katesugarfairy (katesugarfairy) wrote,

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Random thoughts from a workaholic

Hello, my name is Kate and I have a problem....

I work too much.

I give myself super high expectations and often accomplish the impossible only to make people have even higher expectations for me.

I volunteer for way too much, and feel guilty when I have to turn people down... and somehow on the other hand, I don't get recognized or consulted on things that I should be asked to do, that I wanted and asked to be part of....

This often leads to resentment. I hate feeling angry at people who have nothing really to do with it... it is not their fault they are friends with the right people, or have other little advantages... it just makes me ....  frustrated.

I know I should not care and just enjoy my last year at my job, but I can't help but feel snubbed... dismissed... and unappreciated.

I also dwell on things way longer than I should... so what if they people I gave a speech for totally messed up my bio after not listening to me try to correct them... not a big issue, right? I should not let not getting to go up to Tokyo with the others from Nagasaki ruin my summer... I should forget about the little shit things my school is doing/pushing on me...

I think it might be time to hit up a therapist to see why I am in such need of praise and involvement... to understand wtf goes on in my brain when I volunteer for things that don't even concern me... for what... attention?

I am messed up...

I am Kate... and I am a workaholic...

le sigh
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